Ok so life at this moment really sucks i havent updated for hte last like ever so im gonig on an emotional spree so dont be surpised if im showing off like 4-6 different emotions at one instant.... so lets get started with how much life can suck (just for me im positive thre is worst out in the world but this is the first time this has ever happend to me so yeah....) so its the begining of the new school year it is starting out great. within the first 4 weeks i miss 1 or 2 days of classes and we have a new vice principle. he looks into my past record from the year before and notices i skipped litrually half the year. based on this knowledge he wants to kick me out liek these are his exact words and mine... (me)"hello -offers to shake hand-" (vp) "hi, uh sorry i dont shake hands dont take it personal" {btw he a germaphobe...which is y he didnt do this} (me) " ok well ....ok" (vp)" so i see that you missed alto of classes last year, wut me and the staff of this facility think is that youd do better i na different school and we wanna expell you...." {THEY WANT TO EXPELL ME?!}(me)"but that was last year ive changed im actually doing the right thing and ur maknig it hard to do so..." (vp)" u can leave my office now and exit the property if u do not comply with these demands i will call teh cops and have u charged for tresspassing..." (me)" WTF?!!!!!"

So thats that much id continue but im getting angry and i cant think and be angry.... so lets skip to about 2 months during school.

so i find this girl right, she is pretty, smart, cool, cute and the list go's on (she has a very busy schedule) she has so many extra stuff gonig on after and during school trying to help all teh ppl she can. i admire this jsut one mroe thing to add to the list. so we start hanging for liek 3 weeks and we get closer and closer with each passing day sharing stuff with each other and truting each other with info that other wise not even leave our lips.... now i wasnt the only one who had say this shinning star that had just fallen into my world. wut she told me was that she is having guy problems. and i asked how bad could it be. she told me that there r 13 ppl who have said that they like her....My heart felt liek it stopped if nto skipped a beat and awaited the next words that came form her mouth that i jstu asked a question which was well how many of them u think u like back, she responds with an answer of 5....my heart just skipped a beat again but then she continued with that answer and said that 3 were only a infatuation. my heart started pumping again with teh sheer sigh of relife and asked well who r the last 2. she says you and MR X (i dont wanna give his name out it wouldnt be right) and that made me feel alot better knowing that all of this would soon be over and i can hold her in my arms...a couple of days after that she came up to me and said that her guy problems were done, that thre was no doubt that i was the one that she wanted to be with and that she hasnt felt this way in a while. so the very next day i asked her out and she said yes! great, awsome right?! is was awsome till about after a week after we are gonig out which brings me right to today ( all the stuff beyond this point just happend with in a couple of hours of now, well accept for a bit but yeah...) so a couple days ago she gets a text from MR X saying that he misses her and wut not, which is understandable i ahd no problem with this cause they are good friends right? but wut i didnt know is wut they were talkngi about and for somereason and some how he convinced her that being in a relationship is putting to much more pressure on her and stuff. which is kinda true but he over exajurated it. so i get a text about 10 this morning saying that she has to think about stuff and junk and i said ok. and by 7 tonight she said she was done thinking and has stuff to say.

she says that the last couple of weeks have been very hard and confusing not only due to having a relationship but with my health and wellbeing, and i sy alright u know im always there for u no matter wut right? she says yeah and id liek to kep it that way but for now i dont think that beeing in a relation ship is helping with anything (BOOM!!!!! BIGGEST FUCKING BOMB EVER!!!!!!) it hit me like fucking 6 tons of bricks....(really hard if u dont understand...) my heart sank, my breathing had slowed and i felt like shit. and it took me liek 10 mins to respond cause my hands were shaking trying to text back, asking wut exatcly happend if she broke up with me or we r just taking a break. her answer was kinda both leaning more towards a break because she still loves me but just doesnt have teh time or mental wellbeing to have everything all going at once which is really understandable. and i texted again saying stuff like ok, well just to let u know i really care for you, mroe than anyone in the world and id do anything for you and u know that (which is true) and i said and if this is gonig to help then so be it. i even asked if there was anything eels i can do to help. and we talked for a bit but it was a blur cause i was still shocked at wut happend, and i was shaking uncontrolaby but here i am now after listing to 3 hours of music, and having 2 really hot showers to try to stop thinking abotu her for the time being and i feel liek this is the last resort nad hope that it works out. so plz leave comments and stuff if u like and to all my friends dotn ask me wuts gonig on at school just dotn ask ok i cant handle it lol...

Life is hard and hard to keep track of. there are so many paths that you can take and all look apatizing at first but im the end taste bad. life can be however u waant it to be only if u belive and accept that yes life can suck at times but that there is always another day to come and it could be the best day of ur life. a little lyric from one of hte best songs i nthe world by Nickelback. "my best friend gave me the best advice,he said that each day is a gift and not a given right" and that is it at the moment idk wut song it is but i really belive that and ill die with that in mind.

So there we go a speal and a little poem that i thought of i gotta maek sur to writethat down some where lol so yeah thanks to all who r reading this and agree that life sucks at times but are strong enough to accpet it and move on...